Online Bilingual Couples Therapy (ENG-ESP)

As a clinical psychologist with over fifteen years of experience, I specialize in Couples Psychotherapy. Originally from Uruguay, I have made my permanent residence in Bilbao, Basque Country (Spain) since 2016.

I earned my Bachelor’s degree in Psychology at the Catholic University of Uruguay, a Master’s in Jungian Analytical Psychotherapy (at the same institution), and a second Master’s in Group Analytical Psychotherapy at the University of Deusto (Basque Country, Spain). I am currently completing my training as a Certified Couples Psychologist by the Gottman Institute in Seattle (Washington, USA).

My work involves training couples to be able to discuss difficult topics, maintain connection rituals, attune, and avoid getting trapped in resentments and arguments that are easy to enter and hard to exit. I view the couple’s relationship as a living organism where collaboration is key to mutual well-being.

My commitment is to facilitate a space where couples can grow and overcome challenges, promoting an efficient and beneficial balance for both.

Gottman Couples Therapy is structured around three main phases: assessment, treatment, and termination. Here is an overview of how I work:

1. Assessment Phase: This phase is crucial for gathering information about your relationship and understanding specific dynamics and challenges.

First Session: This is a joint session where we get to know each other, and I gain a general understanding of the reasons for consultation. I ask a series of questions (known as The Oral History) to learn about the couple’s history and ask them to discuss an important topic for ten minutes. During these ten minutes, I do not intervene actively; I am assessing the dynamics between you.

Second Session: These are individual interviews lasting one and a half hours (or two 45-minute sessions). I use these interviews to learn more about each individual’s personal history and how it may be affecting the relationship. It’s important to clarify that what is discussed in this space is not confidential. In cases of characterological domestic violence (i.e., chronic), I do not continue as Couples Therapy is not advisable in these situations. Likewise, I do not work if there is ongoing infidelity by one of the members because not discussing this would mean forming an alliance with one of the two.

Third Session: This is a joint session where I provide feedback on the current situation, deliver a report, and discuss potential treatment strategies. During this process, I ask the couple to complete the Gottman Relationship CheckUp (free of charge and also available in Spanish), which consists of a set of online questionnaires that evaluate specific aspects of the relationship such as communication, conflict, affection expression, admiration, among many others.

2. Treatment Phase: The treatment is based on the results of the initial assessment phase. The Gottman approach focuses on dismantling conflictive verbal communication, increasing intimacy, respect, and positive affection. The Gottman Method proposes dozens of specific protocols to improve the relationship and reduce conflict. For this reason, I propose interventions adapted to the needs of the couple that may include, improving the couple’s friendship base (through Love Maps and other exercises), addressing conflict management (using techniques such as the Gottman-Rapoport Intervention and the Six Skills for Conflict Management), and creating shared meaning. Couples learn specific skills to manage and resolve conflicts, improve their interactions, and better understand each other’s perspectives. This includes learning about the four horsemen of the apocalypse (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) and their antidotes.

3. Termination Phase: The final phase involves ensuring that couples can maintain improvements in their relationship over time. The effectiveness of the interventions is evaluated by comparing before and after. Couples may have follow-up sessions to reinforce the new skills and strategies they have learned.

Couples are encouraged to continue using the tools and techniques they have learned to face future conflicts and challenges. They may also plan follow-up sessions as needed to refresh their skills.

Ongoing Support and Follow-up After therapy, couples might engage in periodic check-ups, either through scheduled sessions or more informal reviews, to ensure they continue to use what they have learned effectively. Follow-up sessions are generally planned every six months, for two years.

My primary aim is to align the personal needs of each member with those of the couple and, in many cases, with their family dynamic. My approach includes:

1) Couples psychotherapy sessions.

2) If needed, separate sessions to assess the individual needs of each member (these sessions are included in the service at no additional cost). If one member is undergoing individual psychotherapy, I am willing to collaborate with their treating professional to ensure treatment congruence.

3) Administration of specific psychometric tests to evaluate the couple’s current situation, strengths, weaknesses, and evolution over time (included in the service at no additional cost).